Spring Fisherisms 2020

While the pictures and narrative are really a pain to post (partly because I can never figure out how to get my photos from my phone to the correct Google album in a timely fashion and partly because I ended up losing hours of typed narrative recently), the "Fisherisms" are a breeze to type up and make me laugh out loud as I remember each of them. Hopefully, they will bring a smile to your face too.

• Riley to Chris after he came in sweaty from a run: "I'll hug you even better after you take a shower."
• Maggie to Tracy after swirling a strange concoction of conditioner in the bath water: "I'm making a frozen frosted frolay."
• Maggie to Tracy: "Mom your legs are like dad's chin whiskers. Time to shave!"
• Riley to us at dinner one night as he eats collard greens: "My southern is coming out!"
• Maggie as she watches her newest bath bomb explode: "Look, mom! My bath bomb is flamaticating!!" 
• Maggie to me as I tell her good morning and gently kiss her on the forehead: "Mom, I dreamed a shark at you and dug it's tooth into your brain."
• Maggie to all of us: "I finally got my trail of thought back."
• Maggie to me after I had painstakingly gotten rejected for 6 different jobs starting in February and finally landed one in May: "Mom, since you FAILED all the other jobs, I think this one is meant for you."
• Riley as we put in soil mixed with cow manure: "I think it's gross that this dirt has manyer mixed in it."
• Maggie on the verge of finding out the real truth about the tooth fairy: "Dad, I'm going to write the tooth fairy a note and ask her some really rude questions to see what she says." 
• Maggie to Tracy one day as we are bonding over self-pedicures: "Your legs are big...not fat...just tall...like a man's."
• Maggie to Chris at 2 AM: "Dad, I hear spiders in pipes in the walls in my room. I can't sleep I need to sleep in your bed." Chris: "Fine, I'll go sleep in your bed." Chris to Maggie at 8 AM: "Maggie I didn't hear any spiders in the walls last night." Maggie: "Oh dad, you know that's just a metaphor."
• Riley as we are walking along the beach: "You can really see jellyfish here in the THIN water."
• Maggie to Riley: "Yeah Riley, that's no biggie. It's just a tiny biggie."
• Riley to Tracy after visiting Harley (Grandmama's dog): "Harley is just such a fat little butterbean, isn't he mom?"
• Maggie to Chris: "Can we take Mom to that Crock Pot restaurant for her birthday?" Chris tells me later what she says. I repeat the story to my parents but instead say the word Crack Pot (whoops, I guess she gets it honest). Come to find out, the child is talking about the Melting Pot!! :)